Our help to the deceased
Sooner or later we are all confronted with the mysterious phenomenon of death. And every decent person, to the best of his ability and abilities, tries to give the last duty to the deceased close, to adequately carry him along the path of all the earth. We care about the manufacture of the coffin, the organization of the funeral, the device of the memorial meal.
Only now sometimes we do not give ourselves the report that neither the coffin nor the wake are required for the deceased himself. Naked man comes out of the womb, naked back to the womb of the earth. And only one thing he needs from us, and extremely. This is a prayer!
After the death of the body, the soul either inherits eternal bliss, or retreats to eternal torment. It depends on how the earthly short life was lived. But a lot depends on the prayer for the deceased.
There is a story in the Lives of the Saints about Rev. Macarius the Great, who prayed for all who went to another world. Once in the desert, he saw a skull, which by the power of God told Macarius that even the most cruel sinners, through his prayers, receive some relief from suffering.
The primary and immutable duty of every believer is to organize the funeral service of his deceased relative. You can save on anything, but not on the funeral! It should take place on the third day after death, not earlier (the day of death is considered the first, even if the person died a few minutes before midnight). It is better if the funeral takes place in a temple or cemetery. In extreme cases, it is possible to repent in absentia.
By all means, you need to betray the departed earth. Cremation is a custom alien to Orthodoxy, borrowed from Eastern cultures. Even if the deceased bequeathed to cremate himself, it is not a sin to violate this will.
In the ninth and fortieth days after death, you must order a requiem in the temple, a prayer for the forgiveness of the sins of the deceased. Particularly important is the fortieth day, in which the private judgment of God over the soul is performed, its fate is determined before the Second Coming of Christ.
Funeral prayer will be more effective if, on memorable days, someone from the relatives of the deceased partake of the Holy Mysteries of Christ.
Memorial services should be performed in the future - on birthdays, deaths, and the name of the deceased. You can submit notes to the altar and put candles on the repose every day.
At the cemetery, one should not insult the memory of the deceased by drinking, pouring vodka on the burial mound. It is better to heat the candle, pray, tidy up the grave. At home, at the wake, the Russian people eat special food — kutyu (rice with honey or raisins), pancakes, jelly. In fasting day and food should be lean.
It is good to order long-term commemorations in the temple for forty days (forty days), six months, or a year. In the monasteries are accepted the eternal (while the monastery stands) commemoration of the departed.